How Long Should You Wait before Sleeping with Your Twin Flame?
When I was newly divorced, the last thing I wanted was to get into a committed relationship right away.
But I still had needs and wanted to explore my sexuality.
I thought it would be no challenge to have sex like a rockstar and without feelings involved.
And I tried.
But sex always messed me up somehow in the end.
From starting to feel confident and strong, I went to feeling sad, angry and jealous.
I could sleep with a man I wasn’t so interested in, but the next day I’d felt devastated when he didn’t call or text me.
It was like my ego fully awakened from one minute to another.
Sometimes even a kiss or just cuddling with a man made my head spin, daydreaming and planning our next date or wondering what a future with him would be like.
Even if we weren’t in a committed relationship, the thought of dating other men made me feel DISGUSTED.
So, what’s going on here?
Let me introduce you to the attachment hormone, Oxytocin, who loves to play TRICKS on your brain and body!
Oxytocin is a chemical released in both men and women after sex, just in different doses.
It increases trust and works as a bonding hormone with antidepressant and anti-anxiety properties – that’s why it’s called the “cuddle hormone.”
Sexual energy is one of the most powerful energies we humans can get connected to.
In the same moment you get physically connected with another person, you dive in deep.
The female body is built to “receive” and therefore during sex, women receive MUCH MORE oxytocin than men do.
Your head will think he is the reason you feel this spiritually open and have all these amazing sensations running through your body. But he has just pushed the ON-button.
The feeling of connection to him is actually the connection to the Universe.
In other words, sex can TRICK your body to feel that a man you just met is your “Twin Flame.”
And because men don’t get just as easily attached as women (they don’t receive Oxytocin in same doses) that’s where a lot of problems starts.
You will feel insecure and jealous.
You will start to overanalyze and over function by asking him what he feels and thinks about your “relationship”.
You will convincing, nagging, withdrawing love, or getting upset or angry on him for not giving you the commitment you want.
When you desperately want a commitment from a man, you will likely end up being the very reason why he fears commitment in the first place.
But if you instead lean back and RELAX in the present moment, he will start chasing you like crazy!
HERE ARE 3 STEPS TO STOP GETTING ATTACHED TO EASILY
Step #1: Wait As Long As Possible
I recommend 3 months as these are the most crucial to build long lasting attraction.
know that sounds like an eternity and a throwback to our grandmother’s generation.
Your ego is going to tell that you are slowing things down by not having sex, but you’re actually speeding things up.
Avoiding this level of closeness will not only protect you from attachment, it will also kick up his desire for you even more.
The emotional attraction is crucial to win a man’s heart and that’s why the whole dating process has to LEAD TO sex – not the other way around.
I totally understand if you want to make sure if you are sexually compatible as fast as possible.
I’m not telling you to wait with sex until the wedding night.
But sexual compatibility is just one of many things you have to consider before you say “yes” to a proposal.
During this period of dating, which I call the “Maybe Stage,” the relationship grows with more contact, more meetings, more dates.
You keep him warm with compliments and some affection, but just enough to make him want more and keep him asking you out again and again.
You will then force him to take another door than the “easy” one.
Don’t be afraid that he will leave you for another woman if you don’t give him sex.
Casanovas, Bad boys and Mr. Unavailable will run away from high value women because they want easy effort.
Your twin flame wants THE WHOLE YOU and not just your body, and we are looking for the real deal here.
Step #2: Let Him Bring Up “The Relationship Talk”
Sex means an emotional risk because your baggage from the past, with all your fears and insecurities about whether you deserve love, will hit you.
That is why sex too early messes with your vibration.
If you don’t know what he feels or what he wants with you before you sleep with him, I can guarantee that your head will go crazy with thoughts about where the relationship is going.
That’s why I say that sex can give him emotional power over you.
It will be harder to feel like you’re a prize, lean back and let him lead the way if you continuously are overanalyzing what he feels, says and does.
Sex will automatically make you as a woman take a huge step ahead in the relationship timeline.
That’s ok – just make damn sure he is already ahead of you!
I invite you to not sleep with a man with the first 3 months of dating and not before he has said that he is in love with you and can see a future with you (offering you a commitment as his girlfriend or wife).
When he brings up the relationship talk you can say: “I love spending time with you and I really like you. But what does sex mean to you? Because I get attached when I’m sleeping with a man and I don’t feel good doing it with someone just for fun”.
Step #3: Continue dating Other Men
To not be attached to a man, you need to feel that you have tons of opportunities.
That is why flow dating is the most powerful tool in the history.
Flowdating keeps your vibe high.
It makes your energies flow which increase your power of attraction.
If you are single, keep on seeing other men for movies, cinema and coffee even if you are sleeping with one man.
You have every right to not close down your options!
The guilt you are feeling is just the repeated story from society to make you become LESS of yourself – trying to turn you into a woman who is running like crazy to please her man, waiting for him to make up his mind.
Flow dating will help you remember that YOU ARE THE PRIZE and that you are not settling for halfhearted commitment.
The more you see yourself as a winning trophy he is trying to win, the faster you will get want you want.
Your body might be telling you something else but until he gives you that committed relationship you want (like marriage) you are still just dating.
Repeat that to yourself as a mantra and continue to date other men.
Let me know how these steps works out for you!
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