How To Unlock Your Twin's Heart by Handling Feeling Messages Like A Diva
In my teaching, I put a lot of focus on authenticity and (if necessary) speaking your power by expressing your true feelings in a way a man can hear.
Feeling messages are designed to connect your communication through your heart. It’s about accessing your feelings and putting them into words that let your twin flame know what does and what doesn’t feel good to you.
Your true feelings are the key to your intuition and your feminine super power as a woman - vulnerability is what makes a man want to get close to you.
Most women worry that their true feelings are too intense, too deep, or too much for a man to handle, so they hide, shrink and play small instead.
Feeling Messages are about expressing your raw emotions and what you FEEL (feminine) instead of your opinions and what you THINK (masculine).
It’s about being aware of yourself in his presence and being in touch with the mixture of feelings you’re experiencing at that very moment.
Feeling Messages help you build intimacy, because they put you into the divine feminine energy space, which inspires him to step into the divine masculine energy.
THE 3 LEVELS OF FEELING MESSAGES
Level One (basics):
“I feel hungry”, “I feel sleepy”, “I feel thirsty”
Level Two (excitement):
“I feel excited”, “I feel yummy”, “I feel happy”, “I feel empowered”, “I feel inspired”, “I feel turned on”
Level Three (discomfort):
“I feel uncomfortable”, “I feel turned off”, “I feel angry”, “I feel sad”, “I feel a distance”, “I feel a disconnection”
It may not seem like a big deal, but using the word “feel” when you’re talking to a man triggers something inside him on a very deep level.
My experience tells me that just connecting with your body and stumbling around TRYING to find your true feelings is enough to pull him towards you instantly.
It’s truly an empowering feeling to see how a man stops in his tracks and looks at you as if you were a siren rising from the sea -- just from you changing your body language and words a little bit.
Feeling Messages are the most powerful way to handle “tough” discussions and inspire a man to open up, because they bring warm healing energy into the communication.
In every potential conflict where a Love Diva DOES need to say something, she expresses it by using feeling messages and not attacking statements like “Why don’t you ever listen to me”, or “You hurt me”.
Feeling Messages are about communicating what you want in a high class way without telling him what he has to do or blaming/judging him for his action or lack of action.
What Feeling Messages Are:
Finding your true feelings.
* Sharing or expressing how you feel (if there is a real need for it)
* Starting with “I feel”, “I felt”, or “It feels”
* Keeping it as short as possible, 2-3 sentences max.
What Feeling Messages aren’t:
* Oversharing -- They’re NOT about spewing out every feeling in your body 24/7 not even if it’s a “positive” feeling
* Manipulating -- trying to get your way or making him do something.
* Psychic Over Analyzing -- example “I feel you are my twin flame”, “I feel you are depressed”, “I feel you don’t want to do this”, or “I feel you are thinking this”
* Dramatic -- avoid words like “I feel neglected”, “hurt”, “ignored”, “rejected”, “abandoned”, “triggered”, “resentful”
* Hidden Attacking Statements -- example “I feel like you are ignoring me", “I feel like you don't have good manners", or “I feel disappointed that you didn’t call”
* Blaming or judging -- example above. Always take away the word “YOU” to avoid triggering defensiveness
4 TOOLS TO UNLOCKING YOUR TWIN FLAME'S HEART WITH FEELING MESSAGES
Step 1#: Find your true feelings
Imagine your consciousness as a ball of energy up in your headspace (masculine) and going down to your stomach (feminine).
Focus on the body sensations that are running through you.
After a time, see if you can name the feeling. Ask yourself “what am I feeling right now?”. It can come to you as a sentence -- “I feel happy” -- or as words like “glad,” “angry”, or “inspired.”
Use pictures and sensations to express how the feeling moves in your body. For example: “I feel turned on. I feel this aliveness inside.”
Practise expressing your feelings with men, friends, family, or in the store. Don’t overthink or overdo it. Just replace “I think” with more “I feel” statements to build confidence.
Step 2#: Embrace uncomfortable feelings
If you are experiencing a strong uncomfortable feeling (you’re triggered), close your eyes and sink into that feeling.
Be unconditionally “with” the feeling. Experience and observe it without trying to change it.
Just feel the “shit”. Let it expand in your body fully and you will see that the intensity of the uncomfortable feeling will pass.
A goddess doesn’t judge or categorize feelings as good or bad. All your feelings are valid and important, even the “icky” ones.
Validate the uncomfortable feeling. Say that you welcome this feeling, that you are completely with it, that you find it valid, that you care about it, that you hear it and are open to its message.
Step 3#: Check whether you are oversharing
Before you even consider making a feeling message (especially if you are upset), check in, so you don’t fall into the trap of oversharing.
Talking is still a masculine act, and too many feeling statements will make the most loving and giving man close off.
And if you are vomiting your “hurt” feelings at him all the time he will start feeling that no matter what he does, he can’t make you happy.
Sometimes not saying anything and walking away or leaning back is going to be the best way to share the message "this doesn't work for me or the relationship I want".
Always remember that being a good listener is a rare feminine skill, and, most of the time, silence builds more connection than feeling messages ever will.
Step 4#: Express feelings authentically
Now, if you decide to express your feelings, do it as a goddess would do. You do this by saying “I feel…” (and then filling in the emotion).
The tricky part comes when you feel an uncomfortable emotion and need to make a boundary.
The golden rule is to be aware of and handle your emotional triggers and (if it’s necessary) express your feelings without making him wrong.
Example: If you feel angry, lean back in your body and say a brief speech, structured like this:
“I feel angry.”
“I don’t want… [fill in your NEED here -- for example, ‘I don’t want to talk about ex-girlfriends,’ ‘I don’t want to come over late at night,’ ‘I don’t want to be exclusive, it goes too fast for me’]”
Now end the sentence by leaving the ball in his court by saying: “What do you think?”
Just like everything else, Feeling Messages takes a little practice, but very quickly you will feel more comfortable and confident with them.
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